> So who's right and who's wrong? ........ Seems to me ALL are!
>
> So what's the point? ....... As I said, I understand there is difference
> between the sex’s and that there is need to try and see/understand some
of
> these differences, but why SO MUCH focus on it?
Yes, there's a lot of focus on this issue, but I think it helps a lot of us
understand what is going on. The channels of communication are opening up
and we're learning different perspectives. I'm not a man in this lifetime,
and can't remember past ones (not consciously), so find it very helpful to
gain an understanding of the male trip by reading these posts.
I totally agree that we're all HUMANS - much more similar than different.
But, like it or not, we were raised in gender based modes that put all
kinds of restrictions and 'shoulds' on us. Some of these things lead to
alienation between the sexes. She doesn't understand why he watches
football all weekend. He doesn't understand why she's upset when he comes
home drunk every night.
A lot of what's happening in this newgroup with this gender thing seems to
be an effort to understand different perspectives. For those of us who are
single, it's also a way to learn about things we can't talk over with our
significant other. We're lucky enough to have a family forum to do it in.
<snip>
> I know some people are getting some personal insight from all these
> discussions, but much of it seems to be the same old BS with no
conclusion
> and just adding to our alienation of each other.
<snip>
No disrespect, but I do not agree with this. If you look back, you will
notice how some of these threads have evolved - starting with a lot of
anger and pain and leading to some very good and intelligent discussions.
Oh yes, and some ribald humor thrown in (Hi Roger ;-) ).
<snip>
> Please don’t misunderstand my message. I’m not so much trying to put down
> (or discourage) all this talk about men & women as much as I’m trying to
say
> "let’s talk more about what’s right and wrong about how we treat each
other
> (and ourselves) as fellow human beings". I believe MANY of the questions
> wondered about how men & women treat each other would be answered by such
> discussions.
>
> I admit to some degree of being a little uptight in seeing/hearing so
much
> focus being on "men & women". I’m not sure why I feel this way because I
do
> feel there is difference and that it needs exploring. But all I seem to
> hear people talk about when trying to become more understanding, usually
> ends up becoming a "gender" issue (or a "us vs. Them").
>
> This is not only with rainbow but in our society in general. When such
> discussions get "too" out of balance, they become just another thing to
keep
> us all separated into opposing groups with little chance of us ever
getting
> to the issue of treating each other with true respect.
<snip>
Agreed. We do need to get to a common path of mutual respect irregardless
of gender. I think that's what's happening with these posts. Some
brothers expressed pain and anger because they didn't understand why they
were hurting. I don't think this pain would have just gone away by saying
we should all respect each other - they needed to hear some ideas that were
different than the ones going on in their heads.They needed to see
different perspectives to heal some of that pain and get to a point of
understanding. I do agree that it would be wonderful if we could all just
respect each other even if we don't always understand where the other
person is coming from, but its a lot easier if we have some inkling of what
makes the other person do what they do.
Your post is a good one in pointing toward the future. Methinks we just
need to get some of the garbage out of the way first. Peace and Love.
Legeia